Well...the last weeks have been odd, I'm back at school. Homeworks starting to pile in but why write about that? Recently things have been getting better, I mean I'm hanging out with my old mates again, it feels so good catching up! But it just feels bad when you know all the fun we once had has gone, we're all changing and I just don't feel the same. What happened to the Jess that didn't give a shit? She's been replaced with an insecure freak! I mean come on! I used to be able to sit and talk to anyone, actually anyone and have a good time. Now I sit alone, with no smile on my face and always look depressed.
I wanna go back but there's something that's holding me back, I've tried so hard to work out what it is...but I just can't.
Also, all this festering boyfriend business. Everyone's got one!
Tabby - Nips
Michaela - Dave
Jade - Adam (soon)
Frankie - Aaron (soon)
Corrin - Ad
Chrystynay - Simon
Soggy - Marc
Lucy - Shaun (soon)
and Lettie...well Hal? I dunno...haven't seen her in a while actually...
Well yeah, it's always festering me that's so unlike the rest of my friends, and it annoys me because it pushes me away from them, I can't have conversations like they do.
Oh I want to be socialable again, I mean what happened to me and Craig like talking all the time? What happened to even talking to John? Why does everyone who I once knew and got along fine with just ignore me now?
This is turd...all turd...I mean I'm staying in on a Friday night...
But I guess things can only get better, festering optimistic...
Oh yeah...why's it so hard for me to get over people? Alex! Why are you so fucking nice but just fail to notice my existance...I think I fucking love you. Every single thing reminds me of you, you're the only guy I've got on so easily with...just come back
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