Wait Mr Postman

I found this song in my sisters file. I love and miss her very much. The other night I had a dream about her, the whole family were sat around the table. Even Karen. I turned to her and said: "This is so nice, Karen, we should do this more often". Last night I had a dream that she was standing at my bedroom door. I was crying and begged her to watch over me. She replied with: "I always do".

I regret not realising how nice she was until she was gone. I regret not going downstairs and wishing her luck for her first, and last, ever drive in her car, I could hear the excitement in her voice, and I was torn between going downstairs or staying upstairs, I chose the latter...I regret not sleeping with her the last night. But the last two days with her were so nice, I wouldn't change them, for the world.

So, this is my last post within the year 2005. Happy New Year guys.

Everytime I scratch my nails down someone elses back I hope you feel it

I am unwritten, can't read my mind. I'm undefined. I'm just beginning, the pens in my hand...

Ending unplanned.

I'm having a good time on msn, will post another day

I'm Luke, I'm 5 and my dad's Bruce Lee, Drives me around in his JCB

Merry Christmas folks. This year has been different, but still rather fun none the same. Grandma has gone, Monica and Mark are due tomorrow.

I love this JCB song, the guy is stunning with a stunning voice. I've decided I would like to be a writer. I would use this as a way to write, but I'm a little nervous about someone I know reading it, as if I was to declare my love for someone, or simply slag someone off.

I can't believe my friend is so obsessed with this man, she actually believes she is in love with him. She has bought certain things which contain an image of a Winnie The Pooh character, because that is her ex-boyfriends nickname.

We saw his best mate last night, and he was telling us how Tigger doesn't actually like Little Miss Obsessed. I feel bad, but she should get over him by herself, and not to be told that. But what can I do?

She always plays the songs which were played at my sisters funeral, does she not even care?

Gah, I love Lucy. It was so good talking to her lastnight, she completely understands. I love talking.

And thinking.

And writing, perhaps a little too much.

But when I see them on the street they've got nothing to say

Today I woke up early, and my friends thought it was hilarious that I had puffy eyes and the greasiest hair in the world, so greasy I could more than likely fry chips on it.
So I added lots of mousse, to make it look like I had put mousse in it, and therefore it was not greasy. But that plan failed, as it still looked really greasy.

So I eventually came home, shouted at my mother down the phone as I had tried to open the door with the wrong key as I am just stupid.

I then cleaned myself and (finally) my room. It looks rather spectacular. I am quite a spectacular person, and strong, I believe.

Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly. I am suffering so badly to boredom. And tomorrow I have my first ever filling, this has annoyed me for two reasons;

1. I can no longer go to Barnstaple with Janin and Becky
2. I am so scared
3. I may have to go through it alone

But, I suppose, it had to come some day.

If I use that attitude throughout my life, I would have a really shit one. I should be allowed to write. I love writing you know, could you have guessed? I'm really missing Tab. It's probably because I'm listening to old cds, and she's always been there to listen to them with me.

But, what can you do? Times are a-changing and I'm not.

I always complain about this, but I guess it is something that is always pissing me off. Lets just hope Christmas is good this year.

Overandout

You love my lady lumps

I feel so ill and tired and generally rough. I haven't eaten a proper meal for a week or so now, so I am quite relieved that I shall be eating a roast dinner soon. I have nothing interesting to say, I am just so bored it's unbelievable.

So, it's been a month since Karen was buried. That means I haven't seen her for 29 days. I hate it when I think in this way, but I just can't help it. I'll figure it all out in my head later, or at least to try to reach to some kind of conclusion.

Thank you for sticking around

I love Toby, like... for evar...


You can tell it's Christmas when that lovely Coca Cola advert comes on...

Happy Birthday Jenny.

My Hate List

It's going to be like the poem from the film "Ten Things I Hate About You", only it will more than likely be more than ten things and it isn't about a guy I have fallen for after he was paid to take me out so a guy could seduce my little sister. I know this because I haven't got a little sister, but here it goes anyway:

• It is freezing outside
• I have lost circulation in the top of my middle finger on my left hand
• I am wearing a stupidly small skirt
• I am not wearing a coat
• I am wearing a scarf which I got when I was about eleven and it hardly fits around my hench neck
• I haven't got a lesson, hence why I am in the study centre writing on my blog
• I am alone
• Janin hasn't came into college yet
• I have to tell her later I forgot her weed
• My arm is starting to ache
• I can't think of more things to write
• Craig took the headphones off me this morning
• Ben doesn't text me back (cunt)
• And that's about it